WANTED : LUNCHROOM OFFICER 'BEADY EYE' PRIMARY SCHOOL
JOB DESCRIPTION : Control student traffic....(no monkey business), Use state issued whistle on noncompliant students and teachers, Create single-file lines at a moment's notice, Record and report excessive lunchroom noise, Keep lunchroom ladies under control.
REQUIREMENTS : Safety certificate, must fit into one-size fits all uniform, preferably a mensa member, seeing-eye dog optional, former CIA welcome
*Please send resume to LaFeroceBete.blogspot.com
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Wanted: Human being or advanced primate to run local Water Park/Geriatric Pool. Self-awareness, creativity, and/or consciousness not prerequisites.
Applicant Requirements: Ability to waste up to 7.45 hours/day in a five-day work week. Must shave pubic area, or at least trim into interesting design. Distaste for the public at large a must.
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